Summertime and with school over for a while, we’ve got a chance to relax and utilize all the time and labor-saving devices we’ll need to fully enjoy questions like how Pete Davidson landed Kim Kardashian. That’s a question to ponder.

Among those labor-saving devices is a way to have a quick snack without all the fuss (Of actually making one) so when the kids have discovered those old lawn darts you squirreled away years ago and it looks like someone’s standing in the wrong spot, you’ll have to call them in for snacks.

How easy is it to take two slices of bread and add peanut butter and jelly? In the are you making my life simpler, and can you put it in a can department, Mark One Foods has produced a PB&J sandwich in a can for people on the go. Let me say that again for those who think this is a joke. A sandwich in a can. No longer do moms have to bother producing a messy PB&J for their kid’s school lunch. Simply go to the cupboard and toss one of these into the backpack.

Called the Candwich, the packaging looks like a can of soda but when you pop the top, it’s the fixin’s for a peanut butter and grape or strawberry jelly sandwich. It looks like a hot dog roll because that’s what fits in the can along with your 2 small packets of peanut butter and jelly. Despite the fact that the label depicts a fully made sandwich, there’s some assembly required. Here’s where we start losing convenience and credibility. The promotional video on the company’s website is a fun look at the product with one of the protagonists saying “It’s not that bad” after one flies into his mouth. Were they saying that you could eat one and not die?

The can is 24 ounces in volume and weighs about 6 ounces with a minimum 1-year shelf life. The real key is that’s it’s an un-crushable PB&J. The Candwich may just be for parents who believe defrosting is the key to a home cooked meal. Are we so pressed for time that we’ll buy canned PB&J’s?

Do you remember when supper was cooked at home from scratch by mom? No really! These were the years that are looked at as a fabulous era in the American home when labor saving devices like the vacuum cleaner, dishwasher and clothes washer and dryer enabled mom to fire the help and do all the work herself. These were the very types of time saving devices she used as ammo when calling her divorce lawyer.

Come to think of it, the 1950’s may not be as nostalgic as we think!

Dad came home after work and expected meat and potatoes on the table and an alcoholic drink at 5. Mom had been producing children, cleaning, shopping, pulling her hair out during the day and drinking before 5. Can you imagine what a PB&J looked like after mom and dad tossed a couple down? Who will help the harried housewife?

Swanson’s foods came along and produced the TV dinner. It was a metal tray divided into 4 parts for the main course, 2 vegetables and desert. Salisbury steak was a big seller but when we discovered that salisbury was code for minced beef and other ingredients shaped to resemble a steak, sales plummeted. There were more unknown ingredients than in the average hot dog.

With the success of spam in a can and cheese whiz squeezed from a bottle, how bad can the Candwich be? We wonder if it will have a better track record than the cheeseburger in a can from a German company marketed as a camping supply. That one died a quick death when people tasted it. Partially opened canned cheeseburgers were found in abandoned campsites the world over.

The Candwich people promise BBQ chicken and pepperoni pizza pocket in a can to fill out the line. An on-line video shows the assembly line of a person carefully packing one can at a time. I guess they expect to literally sell dozens.

 

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Buzz Fleischman is a Humorist and singer/songwriter of ‘irregular songs for regular people’ and a character actor who has appeared in and voiced TV commercials and radio. He currently hosts and produces the Joltradio.org interview show “On the Record and Off the Wall’. http://www.joltradio.org/artist/on-the-record-and-off-the-wall-with-buzz-fleischman Buzz was the humorist on the NPR affiliate WLRN for 12 years and has been a featured speaker for significant local and national conferences, conventions and organizations. He is a docent at the Curtiss Mansion and is fascinated by the history of Miami Springs and its interesting residents. http://www.theradiobuzz.com

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